Happy News Round-Up

August 24, 2014 • Current Affairs

Hey, it’s not all bad.

#1 Health Insurance Companies Located in California Must Cover Abortions

YAY! With reproductive rights being attacked and slowly chipped away across the rest of the country, California’s state insurance officials are a beacon of bright shiny hope for those of us who like to control what we do with our bodies. Why? Because they have dictated that insurance companies cannot sell group insurance plans that exclude abortion AND they reversed an earlier decision that permitted two Catholic universities to exclude them from their health plan. Of course, the anti-choicers are FREAKING out and threatening to file a civil rights complaint, but let’s just focus on the good news for now. In a letter sent to insurance companies, the director of California’s Dept. of Managed Health Care, Michelle Rouillard, stated “Abortion is a basic health care service . . . All health plans must treat maternity services and legal abortion neutrally.”

Score one for the wanton whores who want basic health care covered by insurance! *HIGH FIVE!*

#2 Hahaha, We Told You It Was Bullshit: Study Shows Virginity Pledges Do Little to Nothing

The Journal of Child and Family Studies has published a report saying that youths who take virginity pledges only keep them if they already have very strong religious convictions. OH MY GOD. Who would have thought that having middle schoolers promise to abstain until marriage WOULDN’T have worked? One study  has shown that 88% give in to their lusty human desires before tying the knot. AND those who took virginity pledges and broke them were less likely to use condoms or any kind of contraception. Not only do virginity pledges not work, but pledgees with low  level religious convictions averaged more sexual partners than someone who never pledged.

Soo…HA! I know it’s probably not going to change anything because people who emphasize virginity and religion to the point of fanaticism don’t do the whole “science” thing.

#3 Federal Lawsuit That Challenges Louisiana’s (stupid as sh*t) Admitting Privileges Law Filed

Of course, my home state and current home has got to be one of those states where they’re trying to shove their noses up our vaginas and limit what we can do with them. Anyway, the law being challenged is HB 388, which our (douchebag) Governor Jindal signed into law in June. This law gives doctors only 81 days to obtain admitting privileges. Considering that it can take 90 days to 7 months to receive admitting privileges, this law is basically impossible. If it goes into effect, it will cause at least 3 of our 5 abortion clinics to either stop offering abortive service or close altogether.

But someone is challenging it! YAY!

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